In your face

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Hellooooooooooo.

I feel that life has been mundane. I dont think I can go on with my life with barely attachments. Thus, that means when I open the door to welcome the working world.. I cant possibly just be working.

Where is the LIFE in that?

As much as attachments are likeable and a learning experience, and I do enjoy it to a certain degree.. I definitely do not fancy the thought of having a life revolving around only work.

Ultimately, it would be so.. boring.

Okay, as a student nurse.. we do get our weekends free so thats really good cos i spent it really well. Last Sat, I was out partying with Nani darling and my dear sis, Zahrah.. in which we met up with my friends and co. And on Sunday, I was out with Nana the baby ganyut. I loved both days, meeting two of my favourite girls.

And right now, im feeling so mundane.

Oh and i think ive contracted Upper Respiratory Tract Infection by two of my kiddie patients. Damnit. Care for them and end up being sick. I hate it when that happens you know. Like, seriously.

I hate. being sick

And Im such an emowreck whenever it comes to attachment. Only on the first time basis though. I thought i could handle seeing infants,toddlers,preschoolers,teenagers lying in bed being sickly, but i guess i was wrong.

After the first day of paedratics attachment, i went home and slept. The minute i woke up, the images of the babies/kiddos with the IV plug inserted, the crying, the social situation they are in and the pain they go through etc.. flashed infront of my eyes and i started to crrrrrrrrrrrrrry.

So kental lah, i know.

But i felt soo sad.

Just like that time, when I saw the old folks lying in bed all alone, or that time when I first saw an abortion, or that time when I saw a patient taking her last breath.

But im okay now. Its sort of a cycle. First time I see something, it hits me, i cry, i get up, im fine and strong. hahahahhaha!

Its not funny, actually.

But yeah okay! Lets put that aside.

Camchickalaka! (i learnt this word from a 14 year old patient lol)

Well anyway yeah, camchickalaka! I just realised i should cherish the free time that i have cos i will be very,very,very,very,very busy once school start.

Actually, I am already pretty busy. So wtf am I talking about!

Hahahaha, im going to get back to my annual production script writing then.

Now, tell me if life is being mundane. bah~

i just want to go out and be carefree, but not like a referee!

lame.

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rambled by AiS at 8:49 PM

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